秘密花園

'You've got to find what you love' Stanford Report, June 14, 2005

This is the text of the Commencement address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, delivered on June 12, 2005. 

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. Truth be told, I never graduated from college. This is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death. 

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. Thank you all very much.

我很榮幸今天在你們從世界上最好的其中一所大學的畢業典禮與你們在一起。事實上，我從來沒從大學畢業，而這是我最接近大學畢業的一次。今天，我想告訴你們我生命中的三個小故事，沒什麼了不起的，就只是三個小故事。

第一個故事，是關於如何連結點。

我在上里德(REED)大學後的第六個月就中輟了，並在我真的停學前旁聽了十八個月，所以，為什麼我要輟學呢？

這一切是從我出生前就開始了，我生理上的母親是一個年輕的大學中輟生，所以她決定讓別人領養我。她強烈的覺得我應該要讓有大學畢業的人領養，所以我被一對律師夫婦收養的事在我出生前就安排好了。除了在我出生的時候他們在最後一分鐘才發現他們真的想領養的是一個女孩。

而我的父母當時在候補清單上，他們半夜接到電話問說：「我們有一個沒被預期的男孩，你們想要嗎？」他們回答：「當然。」我生理上的母親後來發現我母親從來沒有大學畢業，而我父親沒有高中畢業，她拒絕在領養文件上簽名，直到幾個月後我父母承諾我一定會上大學後她才心軟，這是我人生的開始。

十七年後，我的確上了大學。但我天真的選了學費幾乎跟史丹佛一樣貴的學校，而我藍領階級的父母親工作所存的錢都花在我的學費上面！六個月後我發現我不知道這價值在哪裡。我不知道我的人生要做什麼，也看不出來上大學這件事將會幫助我了解。而我在這裡花我父母親存了一輩子的錢。所以我決定輟學，且相信事情會順利。在當時這是非常讓人害怕的，但現在回頭看，這是我做過最好的決定之一。

從我停學的那分鐘開始，我可以不要上那些無聊的必修課，並開始去旁聽更有趣的課程。事情當然沒有這麼羅曼蒂克，我並沒有宿舍，所以我睡在朋友房間的地板上。我回收可樂瓶以換回五毛押金讓我可以買食物，每個週日晚上走七哩路穿過鎮上到亨利克里斯汀(harry Christine)教會吃一頓大餐，我愛這個。而大多數我跟隨我的好奇心及直覺所犯的錯在後來都變的珍貴，讓我舉個例。

里德(REED)大學那時提供也許是全國最好的書寫指導，在校園裡的海報、抽屜上的標籤，都是美麗的手寫書寫字。因為我是中輟生，我不用去上一般的課，我決定去上書寫課學習如何寫美麗的字，我學習截線、無襯線字體，如何修改不同字母結合時的空間，如何讓印刷變的更好。它是美麗、歷史性的、及科學無法補捉的精緻藝術，而我覺得這很迷人。而這些在我生命好像從來沒有機會實際應用。

而十年後當我們在設計第一台麥金塔(Macintosh)電腦時，我又想到它。而我們將這個設計在Mac裡，它是第一台有美麗印刷字體的電腦。如果我從來沒有旁邊那堂課，Mac將不會有多樣的字體及成比例的字型。而因為windows只是複製Mac，可以說沒有任何個人電腦裡會有這些字。如果我從來沒有輟學，我就不會有機會旁聽這堂課，也許個人電腦裡就不會有這些美麗字體。當然，在我大學時候並沒有辦法事前連結這些點。但是十年後回想時這是非常顯而易見的。

再次，你沒有辦法事前連結這些點，你只能事後串聯它們。你只能相信這些點總會跟你未來相關。你必須相信某些事，不管是勇氣、命運、生活還是業。只有相信這些點會與未來連結，你才會有勇氣跟隨你的心，即使它帶你到罕見的小徑，而這會使一切都不同。

我第二個故事是關於愛及遺憾。

我非常幸運，我很年輕時就找到我想做的事。當我在我父母的車庫開始蘋果電腦時我二十歲，我們工作勤奮，而十年內公司從只有我們兩個人，成長到年營業額二十億及超過四千名員工。在我三十歲的前一年我們才剛發表最具創新的麥思塔，然後我被炒魷魚了。你怎麼可能被你創立的公司開除？

當蘋果成長之後我雇用了我覺得很有才能的人和我一起管理公司，第一年的時候事情非常順利。但對公司的願景開始分歧，而營業額下滑。董事會和他一起做決定，所以三十歲時我離開了。非常公開的離開了。我整個成人生活的重心不見了，而這破壞性極大。

有幾個月我不知道要做什麼。我覺得我讓前個世代的企業家失望了─我掉了給我的指揮棒。我見了David Packard 及 Bob Noyce(HP創辦人)並試著為這麼糟的失敗道歉。我是個非常公眾的失敗，我甚至想過要逃開。但是我慢慢的開始了解─我仍然熱愛我曾做的事！在蘋果的結束事件並未改變這個絲毫。我被拒絕了，但我還是熱愛它。所以，我決定重新開始。

我那時並看不出來，但是被蘋果開除可能是有始以來發生在我身上最好的事。成功的重擔被成為新人的輕鬆取代了。我不確定任何事，這讓我釋放並進入了我生命中最具創意的時期。

再接下來的五年我開始了一間公司叫NeXT，另一間公司叫PIXAR，並與後來成為我太太的令人驚喜的女人墜入愛河。PIXAR成為第一間制作電腦動畫的公司，玩具總動員，而現在是全世界最成功的動畫工作室。在一個值得紀念的時刻，蘋果買下了NeXT，我回到蘋果，我們在NEXT發展的科技變成了蘋果目前復興的中心。而蘿琳( Lauren )與我共同有一個很棒的家庭。

我可以確定，如果我沒有被蘋果開除的話這一切不會發生在我身上。就像良藥苦口，但我猜是病人需要吃藥。有時候生命會給你當頭棒喝。但是不要失去信仰。我確信那使我繼續走下去的唯一一件事是因為我熱愛我所做的事。你必須找到你喜愛的。而這是讓你像為你愛人那樣的工作的事實。你的工作將佔去你大部份的生命，而真的能滿足你的就是相信你做的是很棒的工作。而做很棒的工作唯一一件事是先熱愛你所做的事。如果你還沒找到，就繼續尋找。不要停頓。所有的事都是由心而發，當你找到時你會知道。再來，就像所有良好的關係一樣，隨著時間它只會變的越來越好。所以在你找到之前繼續尋找。不要停下來。

我第三個故事是關於死亡。

當我十七歲時讀到一句引言：「當你把每天都過的跟最後一天一樣，有天你會確定是對的。」這句話啟發了我，從那時開始，過去的三十三年，我每天早上都看著鏡子問我自己：「如果今天是我的最後一天，我會做今天要做的事嗎？」不論何時當有太多天答案都是「不」的時候，我就知道我該改變什麼。

記得自己很快就要死了的這件事是我使用重要決擇的一個重要工具。因為幾乎所有的事情─所有外在期許、驕傲、害怕丟臉或是失敗，這些事在死亡的事實面前都不存在，只留下真的重要的事。記得自己將會死是我知道最好避免掉想起自己有東西損失的方法。你已經赤裸裸了。沒有任何的理由不聽從你的心。

大約一年前我被診斷出癌症。我在早上七點半掃瞄，而那明顯的照出我胰線上的腫瘤。我甚至不知道胰線是什麼。我的醫生告訴我這幾乎是無法治癒的腫瘤種類，我頂多再活三到六個月。我醫生叫我回家準備後事，這是醫生說準備死的密語。那代表你要在幾個月內告訴孩子們你以為還有十年才要告訴他們的一切事情。那代表要完成所有的事情並盡可能讓家人覺得簡單。那代表你要說再見。

我整天都在被診斷。當天晚上我做了切片檢查，他們塞了一個內診鏡通過我的喉嚨、我的胃、進入我的腸子，放了一個針到我的胰線並從腫瘤上取了幾個細胞。我當時非常嚴肅，但是我太太，當時在那裡，告訴我當醫生看顯微鏡時大叫因為我得了非常罕見的可手術治癒的胰線癌。我做了手術並且很感謝我現在很好。

那是我最接近死亡的一次，而我希望在數十年這都是最接近的。因為經歷過這些，現在比起告訴你死亡是有用的但純粹是理想概念我可以更確定的這樣說。

沒有人想要死。即使是那些想上天堂的人也不想藉由死亡到天堂。但仍然死亡是我們共同的命運。沒有人逃的過。就如同它應該如此，”死亡”是單一現象“生命”最好的發明。這是生命的改變動力。它除舊佈新。現在新的是你們，但不久的某天，你們會逐漸變老而被清理掉。抱歉這是如此戲劇話，但它是非常真實的，

你們的時間非常有限，所以不要浪費時間活在別人的生活裡。別被教條困住了─那個住在別人思想的結論裡。不要讓別人的意見拔除你自己內在的聲音。而最重要的，有那個勇氣跟從你的心及直覺。它們不知為何早知道你自己想成為的樣子。其他所有的事都是次要的。

當我還小的時候，有一個很棒的刊物叫全地球目錄，那是我那個年代時其中一本聖經。那是一個叫史都華布蘭德(Stewart Brand)的人創立的，他住在離這不遠的門洛公園(Menlo Park)。他用詩意使它栩栩如生。那是1960年晚期，在個人電腦及桌上型電腦之前，所以它是用打字機、剪刀及拍立得相機。它有點像紙本的Google，在Google出現前的三十五年：它是理想主義化的，且充滿了整潔的工具及偉大的民族性。

史都華(Steward)及他的團隊出了幾期全地球目錄，然後順其自然，他們出版了最後一期。那是1970年代中期，我當時是你們的年紀。在他們最後一期的封底有張清晨鄉村道路的照片，那種你可能會在搭便車旅行時會到的地方如果你是這麼冒險性的話。在那下面寫著: 「求知若飢，虛心若愚」這是他們的告別訊息當他們結束的時候。求知若飢，虛心若愚。我永遠這樣期許自己。現在，在你們畢業並重來的時候，我也這樣期許你們。

求知若飢，虛心若愚。